1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

mental kid

Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

Arrow in the Knee!

What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

want to hear a cat joke? i'm just kitten....

Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

I grunt when I poop.

your mama is so stupid stole a free sample

What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

"I think your a hoe" "Don't worry, I know I am!" "You wanna F*** me?" "Hell Ya!"

Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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