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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Q: what the apple say to the orange? A: nothing because there fruits and fruits cant talk

Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

Q. How do you make a fruit punch? A. In a punch bowl, mix together fruit punch, pineapple juice and ginger ale. Add scoops of sherbet into the punch. Wait for the sherbet to begin melting, approximately 10 minutes, stir gently, and serve.

Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

What do you call a man who's eating thirty big macs ? Hungry.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

Womens' sports

roses are red and violets are in fact violet

2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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