What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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If a woman was born in China, raised in France and got married and died in New Orleans, what is she? Dead.

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It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

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Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

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What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she's fat.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Hahaha

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why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

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Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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