Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

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Knock Knock (No response) Knock knock (No response)

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A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

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Why did Rebecca Black die? She killed herself due to the cruelty of many people

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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What's better than a nice hot shower on a cold, rainy day? Osama bin Laden rotting away at the bottom of the ocean.

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why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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Hitler

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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