A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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A dyslexic blind man

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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its funny cuz i laughed!

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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A young boy recently saved a priests life. He found a solid lump on his testicle.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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What does the rubbish do when it is depressed? It breaks down.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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what did Stephen Hawking say to the prositute? nothing, because he has a disability which renders him unable to speak

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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