What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

17

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

hey justin

thumb_up thumb_down +6

VAGINA.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the black man say to the other black man? A: Nothing. They didn't know each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

thumb_up thumb_down +6

HURT

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops