knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

7

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

Whats the best part about being alive? Not getting hit by a bus

penis haha

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a bus.

what do u call a black person by his name

what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

A blackman and an asian are walking down the street they pass eachother exchange looks and continue on with their day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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