Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

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What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

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A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

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do you know that joke? hmm no.. yaa life!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly shits on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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IU football

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Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

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What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

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I want to stick ma dick in a big bowl o puddin'

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Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

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A Muslim boards a plane and he sits done quietly and politely just like everyone else, the plan lands safely at its destination.

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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shauns beautiful

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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