What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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What happened to the baby seal who went clubbing? He met a nice woman and contracted HIV from her after engaging in unprotected sexual intercourse after taking her to his flat.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops