How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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guess what? bannanas

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

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Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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No antijoke here.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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