Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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What's funnier than 3 midgets in a treehouse? A talented comedian.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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