What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops