1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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