When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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