What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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Dwarf Shortage

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops