What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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Ross.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

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What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

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What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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Why was the leaf green? Chlorophyll

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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