A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

Yo mamas so fat,you know wht, i think she might die !!

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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