Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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