Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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You having friends.

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What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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