Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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A black man walks out of a police station

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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