what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

One time i was sitting down

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...