why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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poopy is poopy

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

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Pigachu is a Porkemon.

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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There's 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and muscular guy. 7 days later, the fat guy receives an invitation to the zoo. It turns he got a new job and his friends was so proud.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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haha

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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