i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

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Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

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Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops