What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

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What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Connor is homosexuaI

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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I love pissing people off :P

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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