What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

i hate when your sentence doesn't end as you testicle.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

Why cant Helen Keller driver? She's a woman

hi bros hahahhah like it up, ah ma gkenny

Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...