How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

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Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Why the did black man climb the ladder? To get on the roof of the building to install a satellite dish.

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a skinny sumo wrestler

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops