Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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The Labour Party.

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops