One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

A man walks into a bar The bartender asks: What would you like to drink?

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

Everyone was standing in a bank happily Three muslims walk in Everyone continues their everyday lives coz we live in a non racist society and nothing could go wrong Then the building blew up

Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

Pickles are moist.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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