What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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What do you calla baby nailed to a wall? Art.

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What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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