What's the difference between a horse and a chicken? They're different species and also the chicken is female, while the horse I was referring to is male.

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A Dog walks into a bar to order a drink. The bar patrons are at first amused and overjoyed to share their night with a playful pet, until they see that his mouth is foaming and he's already started trying to eat the nearest child. Screams erupt as the bartender calls 911. The dog manages to injure two patrons before he is tazed by the police and taken to be put down. One of the men injured has to have his arm amputated, which is unfortunate for his new career as a heart surgeon. The hospital informs him that they have no choice but to force him to resign, after they hand him his lengthy medical bill. He ends up losing his apartment, and his fiance leaves him for someone more stable financially. The man then drinks himself to death, after attacking and killing a local dog with his one remaining hand. The dog belonged to a new family on the block, whose son had terminal cancer. Due to the cancer, the boy had trouble making friends in a new area, and the dog (Sonny) was his one source of companionship and, by extension, hope. The boy is later admitted to the hospital for breathing problems, and after a 4-hour surgery, is pronounced dead. His attending physician was quoted as saying "He was so close to beating back the infection, but all of a sudden it seemed like he just... gave up." I mean, how was a dog supposed to order a drink in the first place, am I right?

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why does everyone like this website? ... because every other joke a little baby is dying.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Manchester City

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Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops