Whats the difference between Jesus and the Pope. Jesus died 2 thousand years ago

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Here's a joke for you, my life...

Q: What did the black man do at KFC? A: nothing, he ate dinner at home.

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Children + my basement + my finger = yes

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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