What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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