??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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the WNBA.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Religion.

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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