What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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