Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

you...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I obviusly meant: Have you ever seen a cow chasing boots? Because the one with the cowboy chasing boots doesn't make sense...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +12

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he suffered severe blood loss and is most likely dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops