Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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Then none of us want to be right.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

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Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

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I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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