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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

If youre African, why are you white?

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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