I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

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Knock knock. With the invention of doorbells, knocking has become almost obsolete.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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A rabbit hops into a bar and sits on a stool, he then asks for a carrot, the barman didn't have a clue what he said because it was a rabbit so gives him a carrot to be generous. The bar door slams open and animal control put him in a cage and take him away. The moral of the story is that you should never let rabbits in your bar.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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