What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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