What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

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Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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My girlfriend said she doesn't like anti jokes and now i'm single ha ha just kidding.... she's dead

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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My parents died!

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Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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What did the black man say when he waked into KFC? Can I use the restroom?

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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