A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Starting a Genocide #YOLO

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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