How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

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no im only tryin to keep it real like a broken peice of cheese.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

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Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

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If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than being a Packer fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... Oh, wait...

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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I walk into a bar...

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the midget went to the midget store

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Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

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Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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