How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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1+1=2

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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SBB

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

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What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

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What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

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Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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