Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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why did the chickan cross the road? who let the chickan out?

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

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What happened after the lawer jumped off the bridge? His family mourned his loss for years.

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Judge: Why did you hit your wife with a hockey stick, Mr. Johnson? Mr. Johnson: My father and mother were mutually abusive when I grew up. As you may have guessed, this gave me a skewed view of the dynamics between husband and wife, as well as causing me to hide my emotions from myself as a defense mechanism. As a sociopath, I feel no remorse for this occurrence.

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

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Sex with people under twelve years/MONTHS? You think I am a pervert or something? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: DAMN STRAIGHT I AM! People use to tell me they know I am good on the inside... Joke is on them, I I fool them all by being slightly kind on the outside!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile. get in the batmobile.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

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What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops