y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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one day i went on a swing, somone pushed me and i fell broke my leg,cracked three ribs, cut my lip, fractured my toe and died of internal bleeding to my brain.

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Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

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Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Richard.

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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