I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops