Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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Whats brown a sticky, shit

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the gitl fail her cooking class? Because she was abused and severely beaten by her teacher

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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whats white jizz

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women's rights

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Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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What did the goat say to the zebra? Nothing. Goats can't speak

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

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Life

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How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops