I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

what looks like a banana? a penis

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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