Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

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Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops