How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you scare a black man? You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -25

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops