Peas

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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I'm Polish.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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