Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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