Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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