Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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can you pass the soap?

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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*knock knock* i have diarrhea

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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