Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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