Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

A muslim paints Mohammed

What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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