Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

Ross.

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

Want to here a joke? Me to...

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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