- Anti Joke

oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

DIY LOL Can't Be Unseen Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Meanwhile In ethugtxt Check out our iPhone app! Popular Newest Random Write Your Own! . . Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Anti Joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. MOAR?? Want more? You might be interested in… Anti-Joke Chicken Anti-Joke Triceratops Download Our Free App! Hay guise, our iPhone app was just approved! Pictures From Our Other Sites ffuuu More Fail at 11 Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Car Failures Porn SFW Quotes From Other Sites “-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you..” via: Anti-Pickup Line “In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled....” via: Clarksonisms “Zero-snack calories..” via: Pointless Inventions “The power to instantly reduce the sales price of an item to ten percent of the original but you must buy at least ten..” via: Pointless Super Powers “I count how many steps it takes to cross a section of sidewalk, and will continue taking the same amount of steps until I realize....” via: Things You Think Only You Do “I love you.... :D.” via: ethugtxt .. Anti Joke Anti-Pickup Line Clarksonisms Pointless Inventions Things You Think Only You Do Feedback :: Advertising Inquiries :: Copyright :: Privacy :: Terms of Service ©2008-2011 Anti Joke. All rights reserved. A Horse Head Huffer Production. Rails Hosting provided by BlueBox

A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops