Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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knock knock come in

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How many light bulbs? 1

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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