Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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asdasdasdasd

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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