Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

civil rights

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...