Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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