A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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