A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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