A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

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The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

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womens rights.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

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What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

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A kid walks into a bar He gets kicked out

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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