What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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