- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

Knock, Knock Come in

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

guess what? bannanas

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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